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Gambling addiction in general: I don't know any more either... (Page 4)

Topic created on 21st Jul. 2023 | Page: 4 of 7 | Answers: 99 | Views: 10,274
LiamSongbird
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

24th Jul. 2023, at 10:12 pm CEST#46
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Auntju86 wrote on 07/24/2023 at 9:51 pm:

Actually you should not be surprised, but honestly...I call the savings bank and tell them that I have a problem with Online Casinos and am now on the hook. It feels like 5 minutes later they grant me a loan of 5,000€ for 14%, which I pay off until today. That's not really ok, is it?

Absolutely not. When I still lived in Hamburg, I also wanted to take out a loan with Haspa because of money gambled away. He looks at the account history and asks me if I have a gambling problem? I denied it. He then had to clarify the whole thing in the 4 eyes principle and then got a no. So sometimes there are people who follow the whole thing.


But in your case, this is really madness. Banks are criminals.

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Tanteju86

I don't know any more either...

24th Jul. 2023, at 11:07 pm CEST#47
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SlottiKarotti wrote on 07/24/2023 at 10:09 pm:
I was in psychotherapy for several years, and had the same feeling there that the therapist finds me too exhausting.


Went there originally for depression and panic attacks. When I told her about gambling and Tilidine/Benzos etc., she didn't want to know anything about it. When I told about my worldview, it was often said without justification that it just wasn't true, which then always caused cognitive dissonance in me. I think for some therapists this complete package that you come in with is just too much. But for me, it's all connected.

Do you want to say what you did as a musician? And why was that dishonest attention you got from that?

I have worked with therapists for many years, have been treated myself in a wide variety of settings, and have several people in my family/friends circle who have studied psychology and now work in various fields. My experience is, really without meaning it in a derogatory way, or considering myself totally experienced, that it is very often people from very sheltered and iDEAL worlds who have no idea at all about fears, addictions, violence, problems and crises. I don't begrudge them that and I'm also kind of envious of the care they grew up in and still find themselves in. The NC for psychology is on average 1.4. I have not personally met people who have taken this profession in a roundabout way (second chance education or something). Almost everyone I met was very committed, but knowing in theory what fears etc. do to a person can never be compared to feeling it yourself. When you are driven by thoughts, when you can think of nothing but dying and thus finding peace. You can't "feel" that. Just like no one can feel the emotions when, for example, a mother loses her child. That's overdimensional. Not tangible for someone who neither has children nor loses one of them.

In my experience, when you come up with such a multi-layered problem that doesn't fit the mold, the reaction is often arrogance out of overwhelm. Rejection. But as I said, that's just my opinion and experience.

I don't want to go into the subject of music in such detail. But this much: I have successfully earned my money as a self-employed musician. When the "success" (defined at this point as public attention and making money) wore off, most of the "friends" were gone and even some family members weren't really interested in contact anymore. The attention related zero to me as a person with weaknesses and strengths, but only to what I portrayed to the outside world. For a long time it worked that way for me and I even focused it because it was finally something who was "me". What remained was nothing.

What do you mean when you talk about "your world view"?

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Anonym

I don't know any more either...

24th Jul. 2023, at 11:50 pm CEST#48
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Auntju86 wrote on 07/24/2023 at 23:07:


What do you mean when you talk about "your worldview"?

To describe all this in writing now would fill a few pages, and here it should eigtl. only about Liam go in this thread.

But I can show you a short film that reflects exactly my feeling/worldview:




It's also by the same creator, I think it's absolutely brilliant to flip it like that:





And when I have addressed these issues, I was always told that it is not sooo bad, or will not be. That I should rather take care of myself than the big issues. Maybe that's true, but I feel like I'm running around with blinders on. It's hard to put it into words, because a lot of it takes place on the emotional level for me, instead of on the intellectual level. But you will probably know roughly what I want to express.

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LiamSongbird
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

25th Jul. 2023, at 11:04 am CEST#49
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Liked this post: Avatar von Arschi Arschi, Avatar von DeinVater DeinVater, Avatar von Paddington Paddington
Hello dear ones,

Am now in the clinic/hospital for 3 weeks.

Let's see what happens.

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Rainmann
Expert

I don't know any more either...

25th Jul. 2023, at 11:23 am CEST#50
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LiamSongbird wrote on 07/25/2023 at 11:04 am: Hello everyone,

Am now in the clinic/hospital for 3 weeks.

Let's see what happens.

Good luck and I hope for you that you really want it otherwise it will probably nothing 👍

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Dutch78
Top Member

I don't know any more either...

25th Jul. 2023, at 11:55 am CEST#51
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LiamSongbird wrote on 07/25/2023 at 11:04 am: Hello everyone,

Am now in the clinic/hospital for 3 weeks.

Let's see what comes up.

The best thing to do now is to concentrate completely on yourself and temporarily block out everything else, including the forum.

I wish you all the best, for the certainly not easy, nearer future, but with each day you "experience" self-determined it gets better.

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Lionking
Top Member

I don't know any more either...

25th Jul. 2023, at 12:47 pm CEST#52
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LiamSongbird wrote on 07/25/2023 at 11:04 am: Hello everyone,

Am now in the clinic/hospital for 3 weeks.

Let's see what comes up.

Wish you all the best!

Switch off and get other thoughts.
Conversations with fellow patients can be very valuable and helpful.
But you know that yourself.
This time it will work out.
Good luck👍🙂

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LiamSongbird
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

25th Jul. 2023, at 06:29 pm CEST#53
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Thank you. @Dutch78, of course I put the focus on this now.... But still I look in here from time to time.

@Slot_Star you wrote me a PN, but I still can not answer. Look for you please also hilfe!!!

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Oldaka
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

26th Jul. 2023, at 03:27 am CEST#54
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Hi Liam, have just read through the entire thread. To avoid that you play in the coke rush, there are other methods (which also apply to other users):



  • there are gambleblockers you can install on your PC and other devices and someone else has the password.

  • you could block the internet locally and in the WLAN temporally via the router, so that you can't access the net with your cell phone, tablet and PC (e.g. even in the evening and at night until the morning). Devices such as a TV for Netflix use or the like could be released. (Based on the device ID). Password for the router must have just again someone else.

  • Sell smartphone and use a normal SimHandy with which you can not gamble

  • Alternatively: Put the smartphone under parental control and deactivate the browser, app management only via parents.

  • In online banking, block all payment providers that are possible for transactions to casinos or wallets

  • The hardcore option is to give up the technology in general for a certain time, i.e. give up the PC/laptop/tablet and exchange the smartphone for a SimPhone.



I have already used many of the above options myself! The gamble blockers work very well. For this I had the most typical payment providers blocked. By the way, you can request this from the payment providers (e.g. Sofortüberweisung) by having your IBAN blocked there. Others you can block from your bank (best with a guardian entry that you yourself can not lift the block. Here, however, specify at least 2 people in case someone happens something, etc.)

I did this of my own free will without any further addictions - simply because it was annoying me. I was completely abstinent for almost 2 years and nowadays I have it completely under control. The fascination is still there but controlled to minimal budgets. Even if I win something, I no longer fall back into the maelstrom - especially because my precautions still work (partially).

To your reason Suchtprolem I can not say anything because I have no experience with it.

It only strikes me that many things are already solved by the following:

If you have nothing - you can not consume. No matter if it is money to play, coke to consume etc.... The goal should be to bring yourself voluntarily into the situation of "not having" permanently. And that by eliminating the possibilities first. I.e. no possibility to gamble, no possibility to buy stuff etc. Sure, it sounds relatively simple, but for many it is a life task. And I mean herewith not durably the renouncement on money but rather its life on its problem to adapt. Avoiding places, owning technology, etc.

I wish you all the best and much strength for your way!




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HuKu_Koln
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

31st Jul. 2023, at 11:39 am CEST#55
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Make the most of your time in therapy. It's a first step and it's impressive that you took it - because it's not always easy.

I was not aware that not everyone is always able to write privately, so I would like to point out that the link spielfrei.assisto.online offers weekly LiveChats without registration. After a short registration with username and password, appointments are also possible. In any case, your counterpart will be an experienced addiction counselor from the specialist center in Cologne.

Many greetings

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LiamSongbird
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

31st Jul. 2023, at 02:54 pm CEST#56
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Hello, small update. Will be here a week tomorrow. I am doing well.

Not much of a program but better than sitting at home going nuts. I got two more private messages and still can't reply as I said.

Therefore @Yvonka, I have unfortunately no Facebook. Alternatively, you can send me otherwise maybe your mobile number or so.

And @FachstelleGSSKöln, also you I can not answer. But as you read here, I'm fine

Thank you therefore of the demand.

LG

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LiamSongbird
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

31st Jul. 2023, at 07:17 pm CEST#57
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FachstelleGSSkoeln wrote on 07/31/2023 at 11:39 am: Use the time in therapy as best you can. It's a first step and it's impressive that you dared to take it - because it's not always easy.

I was not aware that not everyone is always able to write privately, so I would like to point out that the link spielfrei.assisto.online offers weekly LiveChats without registration. After a short registration with username and password, appointments are also possible. In any case, your counterpart will be an experienced addiction counselor from the specialist center in Cologne.

Many greetings

Hello again,


have registered with you. Unfortunately, the chat for tomorrow has been canceled. I suddenly can not log in despite correct password and a password reminder also in the spam email folder did not arrive. Idea?

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DeinVater
Top Member

I don't know any more either...

31st Jul. 2023, at 11:52 pm CEST#58
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I would explicitly not tell your social worker about your current(!) gambling addiction. Write a letter that the rent should be paid directly to the landlord.
This is your only chance not to become homeless. After 4 therapies you should know that the addiction in general, always paves a way and even homelessness would risk...therefore give this rudder already times!

It is also important to do a reality check..clearly your situation is really bad right now, but 1. you have recognized it 2. the realization is a small step at the beginning, but one in the right direction ...3. it can all be much, much worse - do you allow it. 4. People learn or get a brain flash only when they have to go through the shittiest shit ...
But all advice can be word goulash, because in the end, each person is different, learns differently from side blows of life ..and needs its time...

I just wish you the best for you, that the whole thing you are going through will make sense to you someday, that the karmatic teachings for your life will come into harmony. May the universe be with you.

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LiamSongbird
Rookie

I don't know any more either...

3rd Aug. 2023, at 09:38 am CEST#59
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Moin people, small update. Today is day 9 and there are 11 days left. I have arrived well in the meantime.

Yesterday I wanted to buy something at Rewe.
Since I had a Dispo (-200) and a few days ago still my birthday money of 70 euros deposited, I would have theoretically 130 euros available. Well, unfortunately, the card payment was rejected. Then had to leave a few things there and was able to pay the rest of my 5 euros cash.

Afterwards I looked and found out that the savings bank has canceled my overdraft. That's not too bad, but today I got my social security money. Of 502 euros then only 372 euros remained. Then I transferred electricity, Amazon, Vodafone, Lotto24 and now I still have 25 euros to live. And there is still a lot for this month. But I have already written to all Insurance companies and creditors that because of the current situation nothing is to get with me.

It comes currently knüppeldick. But probably it had to come so.

Let's see how it continues.

LG

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Falko
Icon

I don't know any more either...

3rd Aug. 2023, at 03:59 pm CEST#60
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LiamSongbird wrote on 03.08.2023 at 09:38: Moin leute, small update. Today is day 9 and there are 11 days left. I have arrived well in the meantime.

Yesterday I wanted to buy something at Rewe.
Since I had a Dispo (-200) and a few days ago still my birthday money of 70 euros deposited, I would have theoretically 130 euros available. Well, unfortunately, the card payment was rejected. Then had to leave a few things there and was able to pay the rest of my 5 euros cash.

Afterwards I looked and found out that the savings bank has canceled my overdraft. That's not too bad, but today I got my social security money. Of 502 euros then only 372 euros remained. Then I transferred electricity, Amazon, Vodafone, Lotto24 and now I still have 25 euros to live. And there is still a lot for this month. But I have already written to all Insurance companies and creditors that because of the current situation nothing is to get with me.

It comes currently knüppeldick. But probably it had to come so.

Let's see how it continues.

LG


But that was also very unpleasant for you at the checkout, if you wanted to pay your purchase and then find out there ui I do not have enough money ?

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